


Pas de Cheval

by copperpotsnpans



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ballet, Eating Disorders, M/M, Military, Roommates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-31
Updated: 2017-11-05
Packaged: 2018-01-17 18:14:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1397659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/copperpotsnpans/pseuds/copperpotsnpans
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They gave him a medal for killing someone, but just a few short months later, they gave him a pink slip for falling in love. It wasn't Dean's fault that the ballet man was so understanding of his faults; just as it wasn't Cas' fault that the soldier was so lovable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome Home

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a while ago, but forgot about it. Anyway, here goes. :) Visit me on tumblr at copperpotsnpans.tumblr.com

Dean dropped his duffel bag on the ground with a huff. It felt good to be on American soil again. He could taste the sunshine for the first time in ages, and the birds were like nothing he had ever heard, despite the fact that he was only gone for a little over a year.

“You got plans for tonight?” his friend Garth asked. They had been together since the beginning.

“Yeah, man. My brother’s girlfriend is performing tonight; she’s a ballerina, I told them I’d go. I think we’re going out to eat later.” Dean paused. “What about you?”

“Probably just dinner with my parents. I think I’m really looking forward to sleeping in my own bed.” 

Dean nodded his head in understanding. None of them had seen their families, or their beds, in a while. It would be fantastic to not worry about five am wake up calls for an entire night.

A blue car pulled up; through the window, Dean could see Sam cramped into the little, compact vehicle.

“That’s me, Garth. I’ll call you sometime.”

“Sounds good.” Garth said, pulling him in for a half-hug. “Take care of yourself.”

“You too.” Dean returned. He motioned for Sam to pop the trunk, and threw his bag into the back.

He climbed into the air-conditioned car, breathing in the cool air. “Hey Sammy.”

“Hey Deanie. I—uh woulda gotten out but its hell getting in this thing.” Sam chuckled.

“I can imagine. Where’s your truck at?” The last time Dean had gotten leave, he couldn’t get Sam to shut up about his precious truck and all that it could do.

“It broke down, so I took it to the shop. This is Jess’ car.”

They rode in silence for a while, almost as if Sam was afraid to ask him questions. The radio was on, and upon further inspection, Dean realized that American Pie was playing. 

“Are you sure you want to go see Jess’ ballet thing? ‘Cause she won’t mind if you don’t.” Sam assured him.

“Nah, its fine. I don’t have anything better to do, and even if I did, I wanna get to know Jess. I have a feeling she’s going to be permanent.” Dean stated, simply. Sam looked over in surprise; Dean had never taken interest in his girlfriends.

“Thanks, man.” Sam tapped on the steering wheel to the beat for a while before speaking again. “So—uh—are you going to have to go back soon?” Sam’s voice was hesitant as he asked; as if he was afraid of the answer.

Dean winced at Sam’s tone. He had never meant to put his family through this, he was just doing what he had thought was right. Which apparently, wasn’t the best choice. 

“I don’t think so, Sammy, I mean I’ve served two tours, it’s my choice whether or not I go back out.”

“Are you planning on going back?” 

Dean smiled as he replied, “Nope. You’re stuck with me, little brother. At least for a little while. I’ll try and find an apartment soon.”

“Good, I’m glad you’re home. And Dean…?”

“Yeah, Sam?”

Sam sheepishly smiled, “I might have that apartment thing taken care of. The place I live now has an open room. It’s just me and another guy, you’ll meet him tonight, but if you want, the room’s yours.”

“Sounds good to me. So tell me about Jess.” Dean prodded. He wanted to know some about the girl before he met her officially. 

“She’s great. She’s funny and she’s pretty. She smells like flowers and sunshine and she has the prettiest voice. She’s also really nice; she volunteers at a school a few times a week. And—uh—she’s really talented. She got the lead in The Swan Princess, she’s majoring in Classical Ballet. She graduates next year. I love her.” Sam finished simply.

“I can tell. I’m happy for you.” Dean glanced out the window, glad that Sam couldn’t see his face. He had always wanted the whole white picket fence, 2.5 kids thing, but now it seemed less like a possibility and more like a fantasy. 

The remainder of the ride was spent in silence. It wasn’t long before Sam pulled into a parking lot and shut off the car. They got out of the car, and Dean grabbed his bag. Sam ushered him towards a brown, brick building that looked like it had seen better days, all the while, trying to sell Dean on the building.

Apparently the heating and air both worked well, and most of the appliances worked. The neighbors were quiet and minded their business. It was relatively cheap, and the rodent infestation was nonexistent. 

Inside, they trekked up three flights of stairs and into a dimly lit hall with peeling paint. Sam unlocked door 17G and led him into the apartment. It was surprisingly homely inside. 

“It’s not much, but I like it.” Sam explained. “If you want, this would be your room.” Dean walked into the room that Sam was pointing to. There was a bed against one wall and a chest of drawers against the other. The window in the room overlooked a side street. 

“Yeah, if the other guy staying here doesn’t mind, I’ll stay here.”

“Oh, Castiel won’t mind. He’s hardly ever here; he’s a ballet performer, like Jess, so he practices a lot.”

Dean took the information in while putting his duffel bag on the bed. He mentally made a note of all the things he would have to buy.

“Is there a Wal-Mart around here?” Dean asked.

“Yeah, do you wanna go?” 

“Maybe tomorrow or something. I think I’m going to take a shower.” 

Sam gestured to the bathroom with a have at it motion and left Dean to his own devices. Dean grabbed some underwear and a tank top and headed into the shower. 

He twisted the shower knob to the far left, making the water piping hot. He relished the way the hot water and steam surrounded him, nearly taking his breath away. He slowly shampooed his hair, taking his time for the first time in ages. Dean sighed as the hot water kneaded his sore muscles. 

All too soon, however, the water turned frigid, and Dean briskly toweled before dressing.

“Hey Sam?” he called. “What should I wear to this ballet thing?” He could hear some banging around in the kitchen, the noise of pots and pans colliding, before Sam answered.

“Dress pants and a button down’s what I’m wearing.”

“’Kay, thanks.” Dean shuffled into his new room and dug through his bag until he found his one pair of black dress pants. He never really had the need for anything other than his uniform and the occasional pair of jeans. 

Upon digging some more, he found a white button down that wasn’t wrinkled too badly. He shrugged as he put it on. Oh well, it’s not like they were going to a five star restaurant after the recital, at least he hoped not.

He plopped down on the couch while Sam got ready, surfing through the TV channels. He had only gone through a few channels before finding Dr. Sexy MD.

“You still like that?” Sam chuckled and Dean grinned in return. He had always told Sam he liked the drama on the show, but if he was truthful with himself, it was because Dr. Sexy was, well, sexy.

Dean didn’t answer verbally, but instead changed the subject. “Are you ready to leave?”

Sam toned that he was; after locking up the apartment, they headed out to the car. 

“I’ll get you a key made tomorrow.” Sam told him, as he tried to fold himself into the tiny car. It was comical, seeing six foot four Sam try to fit into a compact car. “Stop laughing.” he gritted out.

The ride was relatively short, with few stops before they made it to the local theatre. 

“I know ballet’s not really your thing, but it means a lot to Jess that you’re here.” Sam admitted quietly while they paid for their tickets. Dean suspected that it didn’t just mean a lot to Jess but to Sam as well. Giving her a chance was the least Dean supposed he could do.

They sat close to the front in plush blue chairs that made Dean itch. The velvety material reminded him of bugs. The two sat in silence with the whispers of others to keep them company until the production started. 

The director or whoever came out and made a big fancy speech about hard work that was met with obligatory claps from the eldest Winchester. He really started paying attention when the curtains parted, and the recital started.

Sam pointed out Jess as the girl in the pale blue outfit, but Dean was more focused on a male dancer whose place on the stage was a little to the left and about halfway back.

The man moved with grace that Dean, beforehand, would’ve said was impossible. His limbs moved as he leaped and twirled in a way that made Dean’s heart pound. 

Dean became so entranced by the man; he was startled when the crowd broke out into applause. “Is it over, already?” he asked with the disappointment clear in his voice.

“No; it’s a half-time of sorts. Are you enjoying it?” 

“Yeah, absolutely. Jess is—uh real talented. You did good Sammy.” he told Sam, despite the fact that he had only glanced at Jess once during the performance.

“Thanks, Deanie, Jess is gonna love you; I’m sure of it.” Sam looked happier than Dean had seen in a while. Dean excused himself to the restroom, and once there, stared himself down in the mirror. The three years in Iraq had changed him; his blonde hair was buzzed and the hard angles of his cheekbones jutted out. He splashed cold water on his face. Get it together Winchester, he told himself. He hadn’t been this affected by anyone since he was in high school.

When he heard someone else enter the bathroom, he took his leave and returned to the unoccupied seat next to his brother. He had barely sat down when the lights dimmed and the curtains parted, preventing Sam from asking him questions.

Dean quickly scanned his eyes through those on stage, until he sought out the same male dancer from before. This time the man was wearing skin tight black leggings and what appeared to be a skin colored shirt.

The man turned his head, and Dean jumped in surprise, as the man looked straight at him for a moment, before slightly smiling. Dean’s heart raced as he saw the man’s bright, clear blue eyes on him. 

The longer they held eye contact, the tighter Dean felt his already semi-tight pants get. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

“You okay?” Sam asked in concern, probably worried that it was too much stress on him.

“Itchy chairs.” he muttered back, ducking his head down, and finally breaking eye contact. When he glanced back up, the man wasn’t on stage any longer. Dean supposed it was for the best; the man was probably straight, and even if he wasn’t, he certainly didn’t deserve to deal with the mess that was Dean Winchester. 

For the remainder of the show, Dean spent his time divided between actually paying attention and willing away his not so little problem. By the time the show was over and they were standing to applaud, Dean was confident that he had himself under control.

“We just going to hand here until Jess gets showered and changed.” Dean nodded to show that he had heard his brother and moved out of the way for the people exiting their row.

He was looking forward to dinner, and to shaking off the man from earlier. They had only waited for a few minutes when Jess came flouncing out of a side door.

“Dean, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” her voice was soft and lilting, but her grasp was surprisingly strong as she hugged him. Dean gently patted her back in an awkward manner.

“It’s nice to meet you too. I’ve heard a lot about you.” he offered.

“All good, I hope.” she giggled as she playfully pinched Sam’s arm. 

They made a truly odd couple; she was five-two tops and Sam was like six-four. But at the same time, they looked great together.

“Yeah, all good. Your performance was great.” he told her.

“Oh, aren’t you sweet?” she said while simultaneously pulling Sam down to whisper into his ear. Sam shrugged at whatever she was saying, his eyes darting to the stage and then to Dean. 

“Dean,” Jess began in a sugary sweet voice, “would you mind terribly if we added one more for dinner?”

“I don’t guess so.” Dean shrugged; he just wanted to eat.

“Great!” she exclaimed, while clapping her hands together. “I would just feel awful if Castiel sat at home by himself. Besides, it’ll give you a chance to get to know each other.”

Before either brother could respond, Jess had run off and returned, dragging a man who seemed awfully familiar to Dean. The man was wearing dark jeans and a t-shirt; he had almost black hair, and pale white skin.

“Dean, this is Castiel. Castiel, Dean.” Jess introduced. 

Dean stuck out his hand in offering, and the man suddenly looked up, his bright blue eyes piercing into Dean.

“Nice to meet you.” Castiel said, his voice rolling over Dean like honey and rootbeer on a hot summer day, thick and sweet but cool and refreshing all at the same time.

“You too.” Dean stammered out, doubting if this situation was “nice” at all.  
As they headed out to the car, Dean seriously doubted his ability to survive the night for the first time in years.


	2. Night Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Your performance was great!" Dean blurted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that it's taken so long to get this out! However, school's over (Yay!), so I should be posting more frequently.

It’s actually kind of funny. Dean Winchester spent many nights in the middle of a desert, by himself, his only company being his assault weapon. The entire time he was fine. Not a nerve in sight.

Now, in the back of his brother’s girlfriend’s small car, Dean felt himself getting antsy for the first time in years.

He glanced over at Castiel as Jess pulled out of the parking lot. Much to his surprise, Castiel was looking at him as well. Dean gave a small nod before turning to look out of his window, feeling his face heat up from the inevitable blush.

Sam and Jess chattered up front for a few minutes before she addressed Dean directly.

“We don’t actually have set plans for dinner. Do you have any preference, Dean?”

“Not really. I survived ready-to-eat meals for years, so, I’m good with pretty much whatever.” Dean told her, though if he was honest, he kinda actually enjoyed those ready-to-eat meals. Especially the enchilada variety.

Dean smiled as he thought of those star-filled nights when there was no emergency, no rush. The guys would crowd around a fire, tell scary stories, and eat until they were sick. It could be said that even though they were in the middle of a war zone, there were good moments.

Feeling reminiscent, Dean spoke up again, “How do you guys feel about Mexican food?”

“Oh my gosh, I totally didn’t think about that!” Jess exclaimed. “We haven’t gone out to Mexican in ever! Do you want to, Sam?”

Sam gave his agreement and Jess made a left onto a different street.

“There’s this new restaurant downtown that I have just been dying to go to.” she continued explaining. “I almost forgot, is this okay with you Cas?”

Castiel looked up in almost surprise, Dean noted, at being addressed.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” He turned back around to look out the window.

The drive went by surprisingly fast and Jess was pulling into a parking lot of a brightly lit building before they knew it.

“They supposedly have the best salsa this side of the Mississippi. At least that’s what my mom says.”

Dean was hardly paying attention to Jess as she chattered on about the restaurant they were at. He was too busy watching the way Castiel’s hips swished as he walked. Left. Right. Left.

Dean groaned under his breath as Castiel bent down to tie his shoe, putting his ample _assets_ on display. It just wasn’t fair for anyone to be that attractive. Castiel didn’t seem to notice Dean’s attention and they continued inside.

“Table for four, please.” Jess motioned to the guys behind her while speaking to the very non-Hispanic staff member.

 Their waiter led them over to an empty area of the restaurant and gestured for them to sit at a wooden table. Sam sat down next to Jess, leaving Dean and Castiel to sit at the other side of the table.

Dean sat down, carefully while carefully avoiding actually touching Castiel. The last thing he needed was to reignite his not so little problem from earlier.

“What would you guys like to drink?” the waiter asked as he handed them all menus.

Dean ordered a coke while the rest ordered water. Dean shook his head at the ridiculousness of it. They were in a restaurant and they were willingly going to pay for one of the most common chemical compounds on Earth.

They made idle small talk about the weather until the waiter came back with their drinks, as well as, a basket of tortilla chips and a bowl of salsa.

Dean perused his menu while the others ordered. Classic enchiladas sounded good, but so did the quesadillas. He internally debated with himself for a moment before deciding what the hell. He was only going to be alive once, so he ordered both.

Sam slightly shook his head at Dean’s order. He had, of course, ordered some form of taco salad.

The waiter was off once again, leaving Jess to rave about the salsa and her mom’s ability to accurately predict flavors.

“So, Dean, have you decided where you’re going to be staying at?” Jess asked, interrupting her own sentence.

“Uhh—I think I’m going to be staying with Sam. At least if it’s okay with Castiel, I will.” Dean told her, glancing over at Castiel.

Castiel merely shrugged. “I’m not actually home a lot. It’s fine with me if you stay. Plus you can be like a live-in handy man.”

Dean’s face heated once more as he thought of scenarios in which he could be a handy-man while Castiel could be the poor desperate guy who needed help with the kitchen sink. Or something like that.

“Are you okay Dean?” Castiel asked, as Dean flustered for his coke.

“Yeah, the salsa’s just spicier than I expected. I’m good.” Dean replied, willing his reed face to return to normal. “So, Jess, what are your plans for tomorrow?”

“Are you already hitting on my girl?” Sam joked, putting his arm around Jess, who was giggling.

“Nah, I just need help buying stuff. You know for my room and what not.”

“Of course!” Jess answered his unasked question. “I would absolutely love to help you buy stuff. I love shopping! And it’s even better when it’s not my money! So, where were you thinking? The Pottery Barn? The Container Store? Or maybe even Pier One?” Jess gushed.

“I was thinking maybe Target or Walmart.” Dean was taken aback by her excitement.

“That is a-okay too! It’s going to be so much fun!” Jess chattered about plans for their shopping excursion until their food was brought to their table.

Everyone dug in, and the conversation briefly paused.

Dean glanced to his side a few times because of the lack of movement. What he saw kind of surprised him.

Now, he didn’t really know Castiel. He had barely said ten words to the guy, but he knew something wasn’t quite right.

Castiel was sitting with a bowl of lettuce and a few toppings on the side. Occasionally, he would pick up his fork, only to sit it down again.

“Are you okay?” Dean asked him quietly, trying not to attract attention to Castiel, just in case he wasn’t feeling well or something of the sort.

“Yes, of course.” Castiel returned. “I’m just not feeling particularly well.” He took a sip of water. “Thanks for asking.”

Dean nodded and continued eating, while Castiel took his first few bites of the night.

“Are you home for good?” Jess asked, after dabbing her mouth with a napkin.

“I think so. I mean someone needs to look after this guy.” Dean joked, kicking Sam.

“Haha.” Sam said sarcastically.

“Plus I want to get to know you guys.”

“Aww, that is just so sweet.” Jess said, leaning into Sam. “I’ve always wanted siblings, so that we could be all cutesy and stuff.”

Sam and Dean both laughed at that. They had argued more than anyone would ever know as children. In fact, they had fought like cats and dogs.

After a few more minutes had passed, Dean sat back, stuffed. His pants were tight once again, and not in the pleasurable way. It was in the ‘I just ate way too much’.

Looking around, he noticed Castiel hadn’t even come close to finishing his food. He was just pushing his lettuce around and tearing it into smaller pieces.

Eventually, the waiter came with the check. Dean and Sam both reached for their wallets at the same time.

“I’ll get it.” Sam said while fishing out money.

“No don’t do that. I can pay.” Dean told him, also retrieving money. “Or we can at least do half and half.”

They continued arguing while the waiter stood by awkwardly. “Do you guys need some time? ‘Cause if so, I can come back in a few minutes.”

“No we don’t need time, because I’m paying. Dean, I haven’t been able to do anything for you for a long time. You just got home today. You can let me pay this one time. Next time we go out somewhere you can pay.” Sam ranted.

Dean nodded his acquiescence, putting his wallet away. He had learned early on to pick his battles wisely.

Sam gave the waiter some money while Jess asked for a doggy bag.

When the waiter returned with the bag and the receipt, Jess bagged up Castiel’s food and handed it to him with a stern look.

Dean briefly wondered what that was about, but decided it wasn’t his business.

They all piled into the car and started towards the apartment.

“I should be there about ten in the morning. We can get an early start on the shopping.” Jess announced as they pulled up outside the apartment.

“Sounds good.” Dean told her as he climbed out. “It was nice to meet you Jess.”

“You too!” he heard her say as he shut the door to give them privacy. Castiel was also getting out of the car, with his doggy bag and a large duffel bag.

They walked in silence until they reached the stairs. Dean noticed Castiel struggling with his bag and offered to help him.

Reluctantly, Castiel handed over his duffel and the continued up to the apartment.

“Are you sure you don’t mind me staying here?” Dean asked as Castiel unlocked the door.”

“I don’t mind. Like I said, I’m not really here much. As long as you aren’t holding all-night parties every single night, then it shouldn’t be a problem.”

Dean laughed. “My partying days are long over. I don’t think I’ve even played loud music in, like, three years.”

“That’s good. Loud music is harmful to one’s ears.” Castiel earnestly looked at Dean, as if Dean’s ears were in imminent danger.

Once they were in the apartment, Dean handed Castiel’s bag back to him and headed into the kitchen for a glass of water.

Before long, Castiel was in the kitchen as well, putting his food into the refrigerator. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t much fun tonight.” Castiel apologized expectantly.

“Hey man, its fine. You just weren’t feeling well. It’s nothing to apologize for. If you don’t feel good, then you don’t feel good. No big deal.” Dean assured him.

“Thanks.”

They stood in silence for a few minutes; Dean, at the sink, and Castiel, in front of the refrigerator.

“Your performance was good.” Dean blurted.

“Thanks.” Castiel bashfully ducked his head. “I only had a background role. I’m not really good enough for any of the main roles.”

“That’s crazy!” Dean exclaimed. “You were great!”

Castiel looked at him in surprise and it was Dean’s turn to duck his head as his face warmed once again.

“Thanks. That means a lot.” Castiel told him as he walked out of the kitchen, leaving Dean alone.

A few more minutes passed and the door opened, signaling Sam was home.

“Thanks for tonight, bro.” Dean told him, patting him on the back. “I haven’t had this much fun in a while.”

“It’s no problem, Dean. Jess really likes you. And Cas willingly talked to you so he must like you.”

Dean shook his head at Sam’s assumptions. “They’re both great.” he said, enjoying the way Sam’s face lit up. “I’m going to head to bed. See you in the morning.”

“Night.” Sam said as Dean went into his room.

Dean shrugged out of his formal clothes and pulled on a pair of sweatpants. He preferred not wearing a shirt to bed, he often found himself too hot during the night. However, he didn’t like sleeping naked due to the potential hazards.

Dean laid down on the soft mattress, groaning at the feeling. He hadn’t slept on a genuine mattress in years. The softness conformed to his back and shoulders. It felt like sleeping on an ultra-soft cloud.

The absence of constant noise caused Dean to be unable to immediately fall asleep, despite the fact that he was exhausted.

Eventually, his mind gave in and he succumbed to the blissfulness of sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Don't be afraid to let me know! :)


	3. Chapter 3

The sun shone through the dusty blinds, illuminating the room that Dean found himself in. Despite the fact that he hadn’t spent more than a few weeks in any one place for years, he was always disoriented when he awoke in a new place, and this was no exception. 

He laid still, relaxing in the knowledge that he didn’t have anywhere to be anytime soon. Dean stretched, feeling his muscles protest from the last few days travel. With a sigh, he heaved himself out of bed and headed to the shower. 

After a perfunctory washing, Dean put on jeans and a flannel button down and headed into the kitchen. The floorboards creaked as he walked, loudly announcing his presence to the other occupant of the small kitchen.

Castiel looked up as he entered the area and began rifling through the contents of the refrigerator. “There’s coffee made, if you want.” he said quietly as he returned to reading what appeared to be today’s paper.

“Thanks man.” Dean poured himself a cup of the bitter brew into a faded and chipped mug that proclaimed someone was a #1 Grandma. Overseas, he was forced to drink it plain but here he had the luxury to hunt through the cabinets for sugar. He added a spoonful to the coffee, and then another. What the hell, why not three? Satisfied with the overload of sugar, Dean poured a splash of milk into the cup and took a sip.

He groaned as the flavor exploded over his tongue. His eyes slipped shut as he reveled in the taste. The smallest luxury of fancy coffee took him back to a time when he wouldn’t have considered coffee a luxury. Back to before he knew the hardship that came from spending years defending his country in what seemed to be an endless, pointless battle.

A chuckle prompted him to open his eyes, seeing Castiel watching him with a bemused look. As Dean made eye contact with the piercing blue, Castiel spoke.

“Do you need a moment alone with your coffee?”

Dean laughed. “No, I don’t. It’s surprising what small things you miss when you’re over there. For me, sugary coffee is my weak spot.”

“I’ll take note of that. If you think this is good, wait until you try the coffee shop down the street. Frou-frou sugary coffee for days.”

“I’ll have to try that sometime.” Dean said. “Though once I head back to work, I might have to forgo the frilly coffee. The other guys would give me so much shit for drinking this crap.” Dean gestured with his coffee.

Castiel’s forehead wrinkled as his eyebrows pulled together. “Back to work? I thought you weren’t going back. Does Sam know? He’s going to be so disappointed, he thought you were staying for good.” he spit out in quick succession as if he wasn’t used to talking this much at one time.

“Calm down. I’m not voluntarily going on any more tours. I’ll of course have to go if I’m deployed, but I’m not volunteering anymore, and since I’ve gone so many times, it’s unlikely that I’ll be deployed again. I haven’t been discharged from the service so I still have to go in, most likely a desk job a few days a week.” Castiel’s face smoothed out as Dean continued. “But it’s sweet that you were worried about Sam. It’s good that he has someone to look out for him.”

“Yes, well, I’m sure now that you’re back, you’ll do enough looking out for Sam for the both of us.” Castiel replied, the tension seemingly melting out of his shoulders.

Dean nodded and sipped from his mug. Silence encompassed the room, but it wasn’t awkward. Castiel continued reading and Dean took the opportunity to look at him up close. Castiel’s dark hair fell gently over his forehead and his eyelashes contrasted starkly from the paleness of his skin. His green shirt hung from his shoulders as if it was a size too large. His pale, unblemished skin continued down for as far as Dean could see.

Feeling Dean’s gaze, Castiel looked up once more. “Did you want the paper?” he asked. “I’m reading the arts, but you can have the sports section if you want.”

“Nah, I’m good. I’m actually getting ready to go to the store, do you want to come?” Dean offered, hoping that the other man would come along on what was sure to be a boring affair.

“I don’t go to the store unless it’s Saturday morning.” Cas responded, once more returning to the art sections of the paper.

Dean paused for a moment taking into account what Cas had said. Why only Saturday morning? Was that day special, did the stores have sales on that day? Finding this query too complicated to mull over any longer, Dean nodded his head and made a safe retreat from the kitchen with his coffee.

Back in his room, Dean quickly gulped down the rest of his coffee, grimacing at the hot burn down the back of his throat. 

He slipped on his shoes, marveling at how it felt to wear shoes that covered his toes but not his ankles. The fabric of his jeans brushed against his ankles for once in a long time and it reminded him that for now, at least, he was at least a part time civilian.

Dean grabbed his keys and headed out once more, passing Castiel in the kitchen, still readily reading his paper with such concentration that the cutest wrinkle appeared on his forehead, while his mouth turned down slightly in earnest.

Dean made his way outside, deeply inhaling the fresh air. He could faintly make out fresh cut grass and the lingering smell of gasoline from passing cars. 

Recalling that he and Sam had passed a supermarket on their way home, Dean began the short walk. His shoes made quiet thuds on the sidewalk as he made his way. A coffee shop on the corner reminded him of his and Castiel’s prior conversation. He made note of the location as it looked promising. A flower market was next to a butcher shop on the next block, which gave Dean a chuckle. At least they catered to all people, if flowers weren’t your cup of tea, you could always get a steak instead.

Shaking his head, Dean turned into the small plaza that housed the supermarket. A cool breeze enveloped him as he entered the automatic doors. He shivered as the temperature dropped considerably inside the store. Dean grabbed a cart and pushed it past a smiling woman wearing a greeter’s vest. Some people were just too cheery in the morning. Dean instantly distrusted anyone who was that happy before nine in the morning. Checking his watch, Dean noted that it was 8:45, meaning the super happy woman was definitely on his list of people who should not be trusted.

Pushing his cart up and down the various aisles, Dean added a myriad of items to his cart; coffee creamer, a new pack of underwear, socks, pajama that were much fluffier than he would ever admit, less fluffy pajamas for everyday wear, a bunch of bananas, two toothbrushes, toothpaste, and some of those little floss things that seemed much easier than the regular stuff. He also grabbed some macaroni and cheese, that stuff was his weakness. After some consideration, he added a few more boxes, it could never hurt to have too much. 

The lady at the register was much less smiley and Dean instantly was glad that someone else understood that it was too early for such positivity. “Do you want your receipt?” she asked, her mouth turned down into a solemn frown. 

“Sure. You can just put it in the bag.” he told her. She did as he suggested and he took the bags from her, thanking her, and making a hasty exit past the suspiciously happy woman. 

The warm sun kissed his skin once more. He relished the warmth on his walk back. The streets were more lively on the way back, with more traffic, both foot and vehicle. Dean passed a woman jogging with a baby stroller and a teenager on their way to school, judging from the backpack and accompanying scowl.

Making his way back into the apartment, Dean unlocked the door and shuffled his bags inside, taking care to not let the door slam behind him. He found the kitchen empty, no trace of Castiel save for the neatly folded paper laying in the center of the table. 

Dean put his groceries into the mostly empty cabinets. Walking softly, in case anyone was home, Dean went into his room and shut the door quietly. He laid on his bed and let his head sink down into his pillow, relaxing his body. Stretching slightly, his back popped, vertebra by vertebra. Sighing, a smile turned the corners of his mouth up. It felt overwhelming to have the free time to just relax. 

With no plans until Tuesday when he had to go into work, Dean was relatively stress free for the first time in a long time. Deciding that this was likely to be one of the few opportunities he would have to relax worry-free, Dean picked up one of the many books he had meant to start reading, and began reading it.

The story quickly drew him in and he found himself flipping page after page, and absorbing word after word, intensely focussed on what would happen to the girl that was in love with the strange, stalkerish, sparkly vampire. Which made zero sense, but Dean was still intrigued by the novel.

A knock on the door abruptly threw him out of an intense scene between Bella and the evil tracker James in the ballet studio. Tucking the book underneath his pillow Dean stood up, realizing that he had been reading for hours. The sun that was high in the sky at the beginning of his reading venture was now cresting over the horizon. Dean opened the door to reveal Sam, dressed in jeans and a plaid button down.

“Hey, just wanted to check on you. You’ve been in there for a while and I wanted to know if you were hungry. I’m making dinner.” Sam told him, peering behind him at the still mostly empty room.

“Dinner sounds good right about now.” Dean gestured towards the kitchen, following Sam as he slowly turned around. “Do you want me to set the table?”

“There’s really no need. I figured we’d just eat out of bowls.” Sam told him uncovering a pot and slowly stirring whatever was inside. The smell was what Dean would classify as unpleasant and he had eaten some thoroughly revolting things in his time.

He decided to give it a shot, and watched as Sam dished something putridly green into two white bowls. He took his, with effort to not show his wariness. 

They sat down together at the small table and Sam handed over a napkin. 

“I had class today, and we were discussing the legal aspects of international organizations and it was a very interesting discussion.” Sam prattled on as Dean took a bite of the soup. The taste of overcooked brussel sprouts combined with beets and something else that Dean couldn’t quite put his finger on.

Swallowing with a grimace, he interrupted his brother. “What is in this?” he gestured towards the soup.

“Brussel sprouts, beets, spinach, lima beans, and fennel.” Sam exclaimed with a flourish. “Isn’t it good?” he asked, eating a spoonful of the soup himself. 

“It’s unlike anything I’ve ever had before.” Dean told him truthfully. Sam smiled and continued eating the soup and talking about his day.

Dean choked down a few more bites before Sam turned his attention to Dean. “What did you do today?” he asked. “I hope you didn’t spend all day inside.”

“No, I went to the store and picked up a few things. And I had coffee with Castiel this morning.” Dean told him, grateful to have a reason to not be eating the soup.

“It’s so good you guys are getting along. I was worried he might not like you but that doesn’t seem to be the case so far.”

“Does he not get along with people?” Dean asked.

“He’s peculiar.” Sam responded. “He doesn’t get along with people easily, especially not people who he doesn’t know well. It’s nice that he’s taking to you.” 

Dean pushed his soup around as conversation lapsed. He played with his food vigorously to avoid eating the soup and simultaneously to avoid hurting Sam’s feelings.

“Did you eat earlier?” Sam asked as he put his empty bowl in the sink, noticing that Dean had eaten less than half of his soup.

“You caught me, I had some pasta late in the afternoon. I must still be full.” Dean told him sheepishly.

“It’s fine, I’ll just put it in the fridge in case you get hungry later.” 

“Thanks, bro.”

“I’m heading to Jess’s soon. Do you want to come?” Sam asked while he put away the questionable soup.

“I wouldn’t want to intrude on the lovebirds’ evening. But tell her I said hi.” Dean replied, washing the few dishes that were dirtied during dinner.

“Will do.” Sam answered, grabbing his jacket. “Have a good night.”

“You too.” Dean walked him to the door and closed it behind his brother as he left. Walking back into his room, Dean shed his pants for a pair of basketball shorts and retrieved his book from underneath his pillow. He turned on his bedside lamp and continued reading. Hours passed and slowly moonlight illuminated his room, accenting the lamp light.

A thud in the kitchen drew his attention. Dean paused and tilted his head, listening. A sob tore through the apartment, and Dean was quick to his feet. Making his way back through the dark apartment, Dean saw a figure illuminated only by the moonlight on the living room floor, knees huddled to chest, messy hair standing every which way, and the sound of sniffles filled the room.

“Castiel?” Dean asked in disbelief. Piercing blue eyes, made larger by the tears were his affirmative response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been awhile, so thanks for sticking around and reading! Don't hesitate to leave a comment. Also this was not beta read so any mistakes were mine and mine alone.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! What did you guys think?


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